


Bohemian Like You

by JacobeanMove



Category: Red Dwarf (UK TV)
Genre: M/M, alcohol mentions i guess, but very mellow in general, mostly just todhunter contemplating his life haha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:48:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27920008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JacobeanMove/pseuds/JacobeanMove
Summary: The JMC mining ship Red Dwarf is docked around Mimas and has just taken on some new recruits. One of them, in particular, has caught the attention of the ship's First Officer.
Relationships: Dave Lister/Frank Todhunter
Comments: 8
Kudos: 10





	Bohemian Like You

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by the Dandy Warhols song of the same name, which also features in this fic. 
> 
> I fell down a bit of a Todhunter rabbit hole because the Lister/Rimmer fic I was initially writing got too angsty and gave me a headache (: So really, blame them for this whole thing.
> 
> Not apologizing for any inconsistencies in this fic, it being Red Dwarf after all :') When it comes to the number of crew aboard the ship, somehow I’ve always found 169 to be too few and 1k too many, so I’ve settled here on the random number of 359.
> 
> Thanks to Grant & Naylor (for everything really, but also) for giving us Todhunter with zero background, so idiots like me can do some of that exploring ourselves :))
> 
> This is the first thing I've published in over a decade, so pls be kind. Kudos and comments are highly appreciated, valued, loved, and should definitely help motivate me to keep writing!

The Dwarf was docked in orbit around Mimas, and Todhunter guessed that about eighty percent of the crew were on planet leave, including the Captain. Technically he was in charge of the ship and its remaining occupants, but since the ship’s stationary status and the fact that only the basic systems were running, there wasn’t a whole lot to be in charge of. Apart from the salesmen and a solicitor he’d had to meet with this morning, his schedule for today was basically empty.

He’d just had a late lunch in his quarters and was now casually strolling the corridors without knowing where he was going exactly. There were JMC repair crew working in several places inside and outside the ship pretty much around the clock, but they weren’t his responsibility. The Red Dwarf crew that remained on board were for all intents and purposes off duty, but were obviously required to jump to it in case of emergencies.

These little vacations, which was how Todhunter liked to look at them, usually lasted anywhere from five to ten days, but if it were up to him they should last at least two weeks. Maybe three. And he actually preferred to stay on the ship rather than go on planet leave himself, especially on Mimas. It was much too crowded down there and the food was revolting.

He really liked the relaxed, informal atmosphere that immediately settled on the ship after the planet-leavers had gone. He knew it wasn’t just him. Most of the people staying on board didn’t mind staying one bit, finally having time for either some peace and quiet, or for getting to know each other better in a non-work-related manner.

Most of that socializing happened more or less beyond him, though. However informal the whole thing got, Todhunter was still their superior officer. Not that he spent any time reminding them of it. On the contrary, he’d told them often enough to treat him just like anyone else on their days off, but usually to no avail. He knew he should really commend his crew on their dutiful behaviour and all that, but mostly it just made him feel awkward and a bit lonely as well.

Maybe they just didn’t want to spend time with him. If he was being completely honest, being in their shoes, maybe he wouldn't either. Maybe it was a bit bizarre, casually hanging around with someone you had to take orders from on any other day. He did go for drinks and played sports with people, but they were mostly fellow officers. The biggest chunk of his time off was spent strolling through the botanical gardens by himself, swimming, or lying on the sofa in his quarters reading books. Which was what he wished he could be doing every day, frankly, but still...

Times like these, relaxing as they were, always made him feel a bit alienated and not at all First Officer-like. It made him wonder how on earth he’d ever gotten that post to begin with. It seemed only yesterday he’d graduated from the Academy, and then he’d only had two posts before this one. He’d never really asked or even wanted to become second in command of anything, but it had just sort of… happened.

Not that he wasn’t grateful, because of course he was. But sometimes it just all seemed so arbitrary and meaningless. He’d see lower ranking crew members going for a drink after their shift, laughing and joking without a care in the world, and he’d wonder whether he made the right career choice.

Not that he’d been given many options. His career had basically been decided for him by his parents, and his wife, and back then he hadn’t given it much thought either. He was smart enough for school, polite enough to be liked by his superiors, and apparently also commanding enough to inspire obedience, or at least some kind of respect, from his subordinates.

Part of him had never quite understood this, and thought of himself as just any old guy. That part of him often wondered what he would be doing now if he hadn’t just done what his parents or his wife had wanted, if he hadn’t been so compliant and, let’s face it, lazy. To be honest, he didn’t know. He hadn’t known then and he didn’t know now. He didn’t have any particular talents that he knew of. He’d never really been allowed to find out, nor for some reason had he ever felt the need. He’d never been taught to make any decisions about his life whatsoever. Ironic that now part of his job involved making decisions about 359 people’s lives.

He knew that besides the customary stresses of command, he had an easy life. He knew that over the years a lot of things had been handed to him on a silver platter, including his wife and his job. He wasn’t proud of this. He’d lived his whole life around snobs who only seemed to care about money and titles, but that whole façade had never appealed to him very much. It had always felt a bit empty.

It had been easy, though. It had been handy. And most of it had been a good time. The food was great, the girls were pretty. The lads too, generally speaking. And he’d been too inert and too much of a coward to ever leave.

He sometimes wondered what kind of man he’d be if he had to fight for things more. He usually came to the conclusion that he wouldn’t know how in the first place. He didn’t have a lot of backbone. He wasn’t very motivated. He usually just let things happen to him. He was fine with most things, most situations. “Adaptable”, it was called on a résumé. His wife called it boring.

When he rounded a corner, music and laughter were drifting up to him from one of the bars. It was the Copacabana. The fact that he had instinctively walked this way made him smile. He didn’t come here very often, except when he was “on vacation”. The whole Hawaiian theme usually struck him as a bit silly, but made more sense in this context. Also, it was the only bar they kept open apart from the officers’ lounge.

Todhunter popped his head around the door and looked inside. There were only a dozen or so people in, but the noise could have fooled anyone. The levels of intoxication were definitely high, especially for 3 o’clock in the afternoon. He went in anyway.

Most of the people in were technicians, catering and cleaning crew, occupying the dance floor, which looked dangerously slippery with various spilled beverages. Two navigation officers sat at the bar and waved at Todhunter.

He joined them and smirked, “I’ve found the party, it seems.”

“Those new recruits seem to be settling in well,” Johnson pointed amusedly and sipped her cocktail.

Todhunter gestured at the bartender for one of those brown ales he liked, and leaned against the bar looking at the dance floor. He only then noticed three of the new crew members whom he had signed on a few days before. The Danish fellow, Petersen, had been in a perpetual state of inebriation whenever Todhunter had seen him around so far. He wondered again if he’d made a mistake taking him on board. His two mates, also in catering, Chen and… what was it, Shelby? He didn’t remember which was which either, if he was being completely honest.

He did remember their other pal, Dave Lister, who apparently wasn’t with them this time.

Todhunter took and drank from his beer absentmindedly, remembering the four of them clambering into his office, giggling like school girls and fiddling with their registration forms. They had apparently filled out each other’s forms and were trying to minimize the damage. Lister, clearly just as drunk as the rest of them but still strangely bright-eyed and level-headed, had looked at Todhunter apologetically and thrown down a duffle bag and a guitar case before sitting down on a corner of Todhunter’s desk.

“Sorry,” he’d said, with a heavy Scouse accent, “I don’t know them. I just really want to get back to Earth.”

Lister had shown him a half filled-out registration form, a passport in the name of Emily Berkenstein, and the most ridiculously heartwarming smile Todhunter had ever witnessed. Within minutes Todhunter had stamped and logged their forms, printed their badges and called in Rogerson to go get them fitted for uniforms and show them to their sleeping quarters.

As Rogerson had been doing his best to lead them down the corridor, Lister had looked back at Todhunter and saluted him sloppily, adding a cheerful “Thanks, Captain!”

“I’m not-” he’d started, but Lister was already off, with his arm around Petersen’s shoulders, leaving Todhunter to wonder at what had just happened.

Thank god he only had to process whomever the registration office sent up to him, because these were definitely some of the stranger individuals that had come through his office lately. Not because of the state they were in, because that happened more often than he cared to admit. But that Lister lad, especially, had just been... something else. He looked like he’d been living under a bridge for a few months and was in _very_ desperate need of a shower, but at the same time his chirpy, carefree attitude and his smile had just lit up the whole room. It was a puzzling combination. Which haunted Todhunter a little. And not at all in a bad way.

He’d only ran into Lister twice the following days, cleaner and sober this time, and he’d made it clear to him that he wasn’t the Captain, since he felt it was important that Lister knew that. Lister still thanked him again for letting him on board anyway, and told him he’d been sleeping for 20 whole hours, after the best meal he’d had in months. He truly looked like he thought the Dwarf was a five-star hotel.

Todhunter felt it was best not to inform him just yet about who his bunkmate was. He hoped for Lister’s sake that Rimmer was having a good planet leave, but he knew that was hardly ever the case.

“Frank?” Todhunter almost dropped his beer bottle, as Rodriguez pulled on his sleeve and giggled, “Are you awake?”

“Huh, what? Yeah, of course, sorry,” he grinned a little sheepishly.

“There’s that other one,” Johnson was now telling Rodriguez, and pointing at the dance floor, not in the least discreetly. “What’s his name…”

“Lister,” Todhunter heard himself say.

The women eyed him and then each other mischievously.

“Cute, isn’t he?” Johnson giggled and picked up a fresh coconut drink from the bar, as Rodriguez dragged her towards the dance floor.

A song that Todhunter knew vaguely had come on. He watched the women join the others on the dance floor and thought back on his Academy days, when he’d been out dancing in bars often enough. He didn’t dance much anymore these days, he realized, and suddenly felt old and a bit melancholy.

Rodriguez gestured at him to come join them, but he reflexively shook his head and waved at her with his beer bottle, as if for some reason holding a beer meant being unable to dance. Seemingly out of nowhere came a small, brightly clad form waving his own beer bottle at him and then clinked it against Todhunter’s.

“Hi!” said Lister, brightly, and jumped on the bar stool Rodriguez had just left. He gestured at the bartender for four more beers, putting down his empty one. “Fancy seeing you here, Captain,” he grinned, turning towards Todhunter, who hadn’t quite recovered from Lister’s enthusiastic approach just yet.

“I’m n-” Todhunter started, but then he saw the twinkle in Lister’s eyes and felt himself relax. He grinned and held up his beer for Lister to clink with his new one. “Cheers.”

For a second or two they just sat looking at each other, but Todhunter instinctively looked away when the music started to register to him.

> 'Cause I like you / Yeah I like you / And I'm feeling so bohemian like you

He did know that song. He knew it well, actually. But it had probably been about ten years since he’d last heard it. He couldn’t suppress a chuckle when he realized where, then shook his head and closed his eyes, as if he didn’t entirely believe the memories that came flooding back with the music. The Universe did work in the weirdest ways.

It was one of the songs his first boyfriend’s band used to cover.

Lister, in the meantime, had gotten back onto his feet and was dancing in front of Todhunter, four cold, slippery beers expertly locked in his hands. “Wanna join us?” He nodded brightly towards the dance floor.

_God, yes_. Some part of Todhunter’s mind was yelling at him to stop being lame and go enjoy himself like he used to, especially now the memories of Ben and that whole part of his life had suddenly been dragged to the front of his mind. And that song was just so damn catchy.

_Fuck it_ , he thought. He was always telling them to include him in these things and now someone finally was, and his first instinct was to wimp out.

“Just a sec,” he told Lister, and turned around to ask for another beer. The bartender handed it to him with a knowing wink. Todhunter felt his cheeks flush. _Pull yourself together, man._

As he followed Lister onto the dance floor, he felt uncomfortably tall. He often did, but now it just felt like everyone’s eyes were on him and he was doing something he shouldn’t be doing. Which was ridiculous. There were hardly twenty people in there and they were much too preoccupied to even notice him.

Besides, he wasn’t doing anything wrong. Technically he was off duty. Just having a drink and a dance with some other off-duty crew members. Maybe one in particular. Maybe the lowest ranking crew member on board in particular. _Yeah, this is a bit insane._

Lister had just struck a chord with him, one Todhunter hadn’t really been able to explain until this very moment. It wasn’t that Lister reminded him of Ben exactly, but he did remind him of that time in his life. Those short but blissful months he’d lived on his own in London, after he’d had a falling out with his parents over openly dating a man. Hanging around with musicians, actors and other artistic types, missing classes, experimenting with all sorts of things. It hadn’t lasted long, but Todhunter had genuinely thought he’d found somewhere else he could belong instead of the preppy, snobby world he’d been born into. Somewhere he could actually feel free.

Lister joined him again after handing his friends their beers. They cheered some indistinguishable things in Todhunter’s direction, but he was distracted by Lister wiggling around in front of him, looking up at him with an expression that was relaxed and intense at the same time.

Not for the first time in his life, Todhunter wished he was just a few inches shorter. He felt quite uncomfortable towering over Lister as he was, and the fact that he hadn’t danced in ages didn’t help.

Lister didn’t seem to mind all this, though. He fished a pack of cigarettes out of his trouser pocket, lifted one out with his lips and then offered the pack to Todhunter. Even though it took some restraint, Todhunter declined. He’d quit over two years ago, and not even a cute, cherub-faced lad like Lister was going to tempt him into breaking that streak.

Todhunter watched Lister take a long, slow drag from his cigarette and couldn’t help smiling down at him in what he knew was probably a very dorky way, but he didn’t care much anymore. In any case, Lister smiled back, almost teasingly now.

> It's you that I want, so please

That same song was still playing, and Todhunter realized he’d been singing along in his head the whole time. The words pulled at his heart a little, along with Lister's absolutely adorable smile, and eyes, and face, and everything really.

> And I like you yeah I like you / And I like you I like you I like you I like y-

“Mr Todhunter, sir?” There came a tug at his elbow.

Todhunter reluctantly tore his eyes away from Lister’s and looked into the agitated face of Personnel Officer Rogerson. _What the hell does_ he _want?_

“Sir,” Rogerson half-yelled over the music,” That solicitor you saw this morning is on a video call for you. Something about inconsistencies in the contract. I told him you weren’t available, but he says it can’t wait.”

_Oh, for fuck’s sake_. Todhunter swore internally, but heard himself say “I’ll be right there.”

He looked back at Lister, who was somehow already wearing the expression of a kicked puppy before Todhunter could even say anything. It made him want to tell Rogerson to piss off and leave them alone, but he knew he couldn’t.

“I’m sorry,” he told Lister, weakly, just as the song ended.

“That’s okay, man. Duty calls, eh?” He managed a smile, but his eyes were still sad.

* * *

It was after ten when Todhunter finally closed the last of the files and emailed them to the Captain for approval. Hollister wasn't going to like coming back from Mimas to find them in his inbox, but that wasn’t Todhunter’s problem. He should be glad Todhunter had spent any time on the whole thing in the first place.

Time he could’ve been spending in the Copa with Lister.

Todhunter stretched, and contemplated going back out there for a minute, wondering what Lister would be doing right now. He suddenly felt really tired though, and like the spell had been broken by the long hours he’d just spend on, let’s face it, his job.

Much as he might want to, he had no business going around getting crushes on technicians, just because they happened to say hello to him in a bar. No matter how good looking they were. No matter how lonely he was. No matter if they were both off duty. Besides, Lister had probably forgotten about him already and moved on to whatever willing person had turned up.

If he had even been flirting with Todhunter in the first place. He wasn’t even so sure now. Maybe he’d just been imagining the whole thing, his own feelings somehow tricking him into thinking it was mutual.

Before he could get bitter though, he decided to focus on what he did know. It didn’t matter what tomorrow would bring.

He got into bed that night with a smile he couldn’t shake even if he’d wanted to. The memory of those warm, dark eyes looking unabashedly into his, that smile that made him forget who and where he was.

And that damn song on repeat in his head.

But he didn’t mind one bit.


End file.
